Did someone teach you manners? My mother was adamant that my siblings and I were explicit with our words. As a child, please became the magic word in our house. We would ask our mom, “Can I have a cookie?” Mom would reply, “What’s the magic word?” Walla, our brains would process and please would automatically escape from our mouths. What JOY our parents felt when we made a good impression in front of other people.

Thank you, your welcome, excuse me, yes (never yeah), no (never nope), God bless you—these were expected. I’m not certain if I’m sorry was part of the etiquette, but that was necessary for our household, too. And, don’t forget I love you—the words that always made others feel special and full of JOY.

You may have used different words of etiquette in the house where you lived. Growing up in military surroundings, some of my friends were required to say yes sir and no mam instead of yes and no. My parents never took the manners thing that far.

I’m happy they taught me the art of good manners. As I watch people around me, I’m amazed at what I see at times. Folks go about their business with happy-go-lucky attitudes. I don’t hear please, thank you, or you’re welcome as much as I used to. And God bless you—I’m always pleasantly surprised when someone blesses me when I sneeze.

I try to appreciate the fact that we all have different personalities. Could that have something to do with our expression of manners? I don’t buy that theory. My siblings and I are three of the most different people you would ever meet, yet each of us appreciates others with words. I am beginning to think that some parents don’t care about such things. Many of the children of today seem to take things for granted. They expect the adults to bend over backwards for them. They take—take—take.

One of my current pet peeves is when I spend time looking for perfect gifts for my grandchildren, and some of them do not thank me. Sometimes, they don’t even let me know they received the presents. Lately, I find myself thinking I am done. I am finished racking my brain and spending the time looking for that one-of-a-kind gift. However, that’s not who I am. I want to give the spot-on present to each person I love. It is important to me, so, I continue on my journey to find that incredible, JOY filled item that I believe will please my loved one.

As parents and grandparents, bending over backwards for our kids and grands is what we do best. There comes a time, however, when manners need to come to the surface. Isn’t it pure JOY when someone thanks and appreciates us with words, smiles, and hugs?

Which leads me to another thought—how long has it been since you’ve received a thank you note? Although I don’t send many, I have mailed a few in my day. Mailing cards is another way of expressing our appreciation for what another person has done for us.

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Bottom line—if adults don’t remember their manners, how in the world will the youth of today manage to learn what Emily Post put out there as etiquette so long ago? Should teachers be the ones who show children the way to politeness? I’m sorry, but I believe it falls solely on the parents, with an occasional reminder from grandparents, aunts, uncles, older siblings, and maybe once in a while, the teachers.

What are your thoughts on politeness? Are you lackadaisical or a stickler? Do you believe in the views of Emily Post? I would love to hear your response to The Pure JOY of Manners. Please leave a reply.

May you always find the words to make others feel special, happy, and full of JOY.