The other day as I walked around the lakes close to my home, I noticed a fifteen or sixteen-year-old boy fishing. He glanced in my direction and smiled. “Good morning,” I greeted.

His smile broadened, and he replied, “Morning.” A JOYous thought entered my mind–there is hope for the future.

I don’t know about you, but I don’t want to let a few teen delinquents sour my opinion of the youth of today. Life is different from ten, twenty, and thirty years ago; however, even then society came face-to-face with punks and juvenile delinquents. Thinking back to the time when we raised our children, I believe a few basics helped their generation turn into influential adults.

Don and I were not perfect parents, but we did the best we could with our resources. Looking back, I wish I’d been more attentive. I should have spent more time sitting in the stands when they played sports. If I had it to do again, I wouldn’t have been a workaholic.

We raised our four children in a strict household. They asked before they left the house. When the streetlights turned on, they came inside. Most of the time, we knew who they were with and where they plopped their backsides. I’m sure they pulled a few over on us. For the most part, however, our kids obliged and came home at the time expected. If they couldn’t get back by curfew, they called.

Would you believe they helped around the house? Once a week I assigned a daily household chore to each child. On the weekend, they helped me clean. My kids also did their own laundry. I didn’t realize at the time, but my need for help began to mold them into responsible adults.

Once a year, the six of us took a family vacation. We loaded the van with camping gear, food, clothes, the dog, and whatever else we thought we needed. These trips became the center of our year. Work, school, friends, and obligations forgotten, we spent quality time together and depended on one another. Every day of our family time included laughter, play, meals, exploration, fishing, and tubs of red licorice and gummy bears.

To this day, our grown children take their families on summer vacations. They continue to have fond memories of our summer camping trips. Some even include the gummy bears on their vacations.

I have learned through the years, our children want to know they matter. They thrive when we listen to their words—and read between the lines. The old-fashioned parenting method of seeing children but not hearing them needs to remain in the past. When one of my grandchildren tells me a long-winded story, I find myself captivated by his or her excitement. When I take the time to listen and respond, they know I care, and I find JOY in the experience.

For those parents who aren’t sure your teens ‘get it’, I have hope in the potential of the youth of today. If they feel loved and cared for and bond with an influential adult, their chances of becoming outstanding citizens increase. When they learn to care about others more than themselves, they have what it takes. The youth of today can grow up and make a difference in the world around them.

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While on a visit to Yosemite National Park, my husband and I enJOYed breakfast at a cafeteria in the heart of the park. Before we left to sightsee, I headed to the bathroom. A pre-teen opened the door and started to leave the bathroom. She held the door open and let me pass. I thanked her and with a smile, she politely said, “You’re welcome.”

Before I left the bathroom, the girl’s mother entered. She and I chatted for a brief time, and I commended her for a job well done. It pleased her to hear of her daughter’s politeness. She told me her grandfather brought her to Yosemite when she was a child. The time he spent with her during their family vacation must have left an imprint on her heart. She and her husband followed suit and brought their children to the park to make forever memories of JOY.

Although some teens have little or no manners or concern for others, there are those who make my heart sing. I don’t want the shenanigans of a few youth to make me lose faith and hope for tomorrow.

May you find JOY from the teens in your life as you show them how to be influential people who make positive differences today and in the future.